2003-04-22 - 10:28 a.m.
I just got back from spending a weekend with my family over Easter. It makes me realize how lucky I am to have them. A lot of people grow up wondering if their parents loved them, or feeling unloved. This concept is so foreign to me! If I ever have children, I hope to be half the parent that my parents were to me.
My brother and I hid the Easter eggs for all the cousins to go run and find. They are so cute. It made me feel very old though. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was looking for the eggs over at my grandma's house? Wasn't it not all that long ago that finding 50 cents seemed like a lot? Something kind of funny is that we hid colored boiled eggs along with the plastic money eggs, except my Aunt Sara's family accidentally colored some raw eggs, which we also hid. "Hey! Let's give raw eggs to children and let them run around with them! Sickos," my Uncle Larry said. It was hilarious. One of my cousins fell with a raw egg and cracked it just a little bit, so my Uncle Terry threw it into the woods, where it hit some branches and came raining down. I thought it was kind of cool, but so did Teddy, who wanted to start thowing his eggs into the woods. Terry (his dad) said he only did that because his egg was raw, so Teddy proceeded to crack each one of his eggs to find a raw one. Lots of laughs. Another small glimpse into family life at the Sweetsers is I was drinking coffee and talking to my mom while she was having a cigarette outside on the front stoop. We were talking about names you have to choose to create accounts for various things, but all names seem like they've been taken once you try to choose some. (much like I was complaining about my first entry for a diaryland name) So for Orbitz my mom decided on Nerdmeister, except when my dad tried to log on but couldn't they found out my mom spelled it Nerdmister. Nerd Mr. ? I couldn't stop laughing. I should choose some name like that as my default name. Welcome, geekazod.
I also found out that Jamie is moving to Texas with Casey this September. It made me think about how we all contemned their relationship when it started, or at least made fun of them, since we were all 5 years out of high school and she was still IN high school. However, theirs is one of the few good relationships that any of my friends can claim to have; the rest of us are still searching for someone to love. Or someone who will love us back. Or someone logistically possible to be with. or or or...
If two people are happy, who are we to make fun of them by saying hey! she's not even 18 yet! They both got their ear pierced together in the same place a month or two ago. I wonder if they'll get married? I think they have a shot at it.
I can't wait to be out of the army and living back in Minnesota. What a wonderful place to be. I'm excited about going to college. I'm excited to be surrounded by people who care about me again. Man! I really took that forgranted. I'm excited to stand in the future and look back now on all the people I spent so much time pining after and say "well I'm glad thats over with now."
I hate living in the future. The present is my greatest challange. I must find a way to be happy in Augusta, Georgia, and not spend all my time wishing I was in Minnesota, or Spain, or Ann Arbor, or San Antonio, or anywhere but here! hmmmmm.....