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2003-07-16 - 1:19 p.m.

I'm feeling really lazy right now. I need to go to the store and get some groceries. I really mean need and not want. If I don't get some food, I'll die.

I used to work at a bakery in the afternoons. People would come in and say to me, I need a dozen donuts. I need 5 donut holes and two glazed donuts. I need a bluberry and cream cheese muffin. It never stopped being funny to me. Even the memory brings a smile to my face. Do ya really NEED those 5 donut holes? Are ya gonna DIE without those dozen donuts? Probably, ya fat fuck.

Jack Kerouac once wrote that all the prettiest girls lived in Des Moines. Minneapolis is close enough in geography and general populace to make me wonder what the hell he was talking about. Minnesota is the home of the fat chick. Even Georgians have nothin on us. Iowans are much the same as Minnesotans, except there's not as much to do there. Iowa is Minnesota's bitch.

Once I stopped in a rest stop in Iowa. It was a very large barn on the outside, but inside it was the most modern and cleanest rest stop I've ever seen. It was the first time I've ever seen internet access for $2 at a little terminal. Everything in the bathroom was automated. They had a crazy vending machine. I still remember I bought a Snapple Whippersnapple drink.

Can you tell I'm putting off going to the store to get groceries? Reminiscing about a long consumed Whippersnapple.

When I get depressed, I don't want to do anything. I want to be waited on hand and foot, but I don't want to see anyone. I want robots to do it all. Even going to sleep is too much of an effort. I just sit, and sit.

If I force myself to get up though, I'll go to the movie store and pick up some ridiculous movie, and then my sitting will have a purpose.

Now that I've written it down, I have to go. Here I go. I'm going to the store. I'm picking up groceries. I'm renting a movie that I'll just love. I'm driving. I'm driving.

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