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2003-09-15 - 9:02 a.m.

Over at Josh's apartment the other night, I tried a new wine: a shiraz and cabernet blend. It was not very good, and further proof to myself that I should stay away from most blends.

We watched a movie entitled Equilibrium. The premise was everyone takes drugs to prevent them from feeling anything. This prevents war and other negative things, but also prevents love. Frankly, I didn't see what the big deal was. Where can I get a hold of THIS drug? I wondered. Which is when it occured to me that I really need to get out of this place, and thank God that's only a couple months away. A drug that takes away emotions seems like a good idea? When did I come this close to dying inside? Yikes!

Nice to have found out yesterday that Sean sees me as the final alternative for someone to talk to: only after everyone else has completely left. Moot is all I have to say to myself.

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