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2003-12-05 - 8:33 a.m.

Today I'm going Christmas shopping with my mom. We're going to get gifts for all the smaller cousins, then out to lunch at the Cheesecake Factory, and then perhaps see a movie. We both want to see Love Actually, which we've both heard is very good. My dad, of course, would rather see Samurai, which I also want to see. But in situations like this one, my mom always wins.

Another lonely day. I don't mean not having people around me, and things to do with them; by lonely, I mean completely devoid of any romance. I'd better get used to it; I think having been in the military for so long is going to make me spoiled. Even though all the attention that comes with being one of the only women around used to bother me, I think a part of me will also miss it.

Right now, I miss having someone around who I can wake up next to and make a dozen eggs with. Someone who will go backpacking with me in the middle of the night. Someone who will have crazy conversations with me in the middle of the night, and not remember any of it the next day. Which was nice.

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